Crooked Spine Crooked Mind

Well things have gone awesome for me the past week. Both the Lawyer and Judge were very optimistic and want me to see a specialist and therapist (THIS MEANS I CAN GET MY MRI FINALLY!!!!!!). I was so scared but everything went great. I did exactly what the Lawyer said and answered with yes or no and held my voice up. It wasn’t too bad of an experience.

But wait! There’s more! On Tuesday I went to the doctor. Thinking they wouldn’t fill the important stuff till today I wasn’t expecting it but they filled EVERYTHING. I figured my insurance would throw a fit having one thing be 2 days early but they came through for me this time.

I also have one more thing but I wont jinx it by saying what it is. Only 1 person knows and maybe I will tell later on. But for now na na na na na, I have a secret!

Well here I am at this nifty new site. Thank you my Love. I guess I will start out by saying I am easily annoyed. You will notice this by posts eventually. I also love to share things so you will see a lot of that too. Sometimes things just get to be too much and I need a place to talk. I know my loving Husband gets tired of hearing the same things over and over again so here I am.

First off I wanna say Thanks to everyone who has been there for me. I have some great friends and they know I like to take care of them. The 2 most important people in my life and the 2 you will most likely read most about are my Husband Jim and my son Jonas. They are my best friends and have been there for me through thick and thin. Jim has taken care of me when I needed him most and I will never be able to repay him for everything he has done for me. I love him so much.

You will also hear about our families. My Mother currently lives with us as does Jim’s father. I get easily annoyed by them so you will probably think I’m a bitch for some of the things i say about them but there is only so much I can take. The others you will probably read about are Tonya who I have known since 3rd grade. Her son is my godson and as cute as a button. Alethea is another one. She is my adopted mom. I adopted her and enjoy her friendship very much.

Jess is probably someone else you will read about. She is a friend of Tonya’s and mine back from when we were younger. She’s a nice girl and lives close to Tonya in California. I lived in California as well till 2004 when we decided to move to Missouri since it is cheaper here. We are now looking to move again soon. Away from the family drama…. But that’s another story for another time. Anyways I’ve said enough for tonight and I’m sure I’ll be back.

Thanks again Jim for setting this up for me. I love you and you know it.

Short version: I am 28 and have had scoliosis and arthritis since I was 16. I got pregnant a few years ago and after giving birth and a agonizing few months of unanswered questions I was told my back is worse than ever. I have a double major curve (both top and bottom are curved) as well as disc loss in my lower back and arthritis. This will require surgery.

Long version: I am 28 and currently reside in the boonies. I am a mother and wife. Shortly after the birth of my son I began having really bad back spasms. Thinking it was just from the shot they gave me when they did the c-section I ignored it. A few months later I asked my doctor about it. Without x-rays he said it was muscle spasms and gave me a low grade pain killer.

I ended up switching doctors and getting x-rays that showed that my spine was worsening (i had been diagnosed at 16 but was told it was not bad enough to need anything done). I now have a double major curve, arthritis, disc loss and bone spurs in my lower back. After finding out and seeing a specialist who told me to lose some weight and quit smoking before he could do surgery, here I am. 30lbs lighter albeit still smoking.

The reason I started this is to talk about this situation. I guess I’ve been seeing the worst of the American health care system since this whole thing has begun. I am currently fighting for SSI and the treatment i need to get myself better. My insurance company has fought me every step of the way deeming MRI’s and CT Scans “not a medical necessity”.

Today was my first x-ray in over a year. It was supposed to be a CT Scan but the insurance nixed that idea. I am currently appealing their decision. I have also been introduced to the great “pill pyramid” as i like to call it and am currently on a laundry list of pills. Vicodin for the pain, Zantac and Compazine for the ulcer and nausea the Vicodin causes, Klonopin for the stress, Tofranyl for sleep, Inhailers for my asthma. It’s a never ending cycle and a vicious one at that.

I guess I could just write about whatever, I really have no life. All I want is to be fixed so I can live my life and be a mother to my son. The mother he deserves….